Zing Dark Chocolate Coconut Nutrition Bar


I appreciate that this Zing company doesn't bullshit you on serving size to make the nutrition facts label look good. They also say it's vegan, organic ingredients, blah blah blah I eat meat and I regularly inhale tetrachloroethylene so I don't give a shit.

This bar smells like chocolate and chews like coconut plus a little crunch, so it's truth in advertising. It has all the hallmarks of a candy bar, but unlike some liars parading junk food as hippie goodness, this actually looks hippie legit. It's a bit of grainy as you chew, but it's tasty as hell, so I'll forgive that for the fact that it's got as much protein and more fiber compared to a protein bar that leaves chia seeds stuck in your teeth all goddamn day.

Seriously, this thing is pretty good. Would eat again.

Deja Poop Score: 4/10. Standard chocolate bar resemblance, but not significantly turdlike.

Gnaw on this log at:
http://www.zingbars.com/12-bars-of-chocolate-coconut/

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Eat Fresco: Balsamic Glazed Grilled Salmon lunch

Image
You know what's really unexpected? Flavorful salmon and rice orzo prepackaged in a microwavable plate. It's like getting dry gouda in a can of pressurized cheese .  My expectations dropped further when I saw the thing make its own hot-air casket. A dead fish was performing sedentary bikram yoga. But it came out flaky and delicious. It had great texture, the orzo had good bite — it wasn't cooked to mush — and there was nothing weird about it at all. It didn't even fill up the office break room with that much-maligned fishy smell. I got compliments. It needed salt 1 , but I'd definitely get another. It's pretty scrumptious. Deja poop score: 0/10. Not poopy at all. Fish on via Eat Fresco Foods, at  http://eatfrescofoods.com/products/balsamic-glazed-grilled-salmon/ 1  I am a fiend for salt. Food is just a vehicle for sodium chloride.
Read more

Nongshim Shrimp Crackers

Image
One of my co-workers is Korean. To show gratitude for some projects I helped her with, she got me some Korean snacks. These are shrimp crackers, which are apparently a popular salty treat. I dug in. Upon opening the bag, a wave of fishy ocean scent hit my nose. I was afraid. I knew that smell. You might know it too. Its texture is remarkably similar to Cheetos, with a taste that's somehow reminiscent of plain Pringles (or, in marketing-speak, "Original Flavor"), even though they're wheat snacks, not potato. The ingredients list also features ground shrimp, which is news to me. I thought they lived in the water . But the actual flavor is really mild... right up until you burp. Then the fish-market smell burbles out of your gut like steam from a boiling chum bucket. Sorry, it's not really gross at all. I just couldn't resist the visual. At most it's a bit unusual, but if you're a fan of seafood it's probably an irrisistible snack. D
Read more