Dirty Hippie Snacks

This tastes nothing like coffee. But despite that failure in labeling, it is delicious. Nuts. Honey. Tasty. Highly recommended, though I don't know the price. Deja poop score: 8 out of 10. I'll be seeing you again soon, in a more cylindrical shape. Product info: http://shop.simplesquares.com/coffee/

I had one bite of this thing at 7:45 a.m. It's now 9:15 and I'm still picking goddamn chia seeds out of my teeth. It also tastes nothing like coconut. What a hateful snack. Deja Poop Score: 3/10. The color matches up with the first solid post-food-poisoning plop, but you'd have to have been munching nuts during recovery.